"The towel story"

A short but amusing anecdote we call "the towel story":

Me (to Chris): I hope you brought a towel, because I only have one...
Chris: Are you serious?
Me: Yes, I told you to bring a towel, remember!?!
Chris: Yeah I remember, but I thought you were just making some nerdy reference to Hitchhiker's Guide...

Laughter ensues.

(I guess that's what I get for being such a nerd...)

Text messaging conversation from 12:05 am this morning

Me (to my brother): How many protons does Helium have?
My brother: Two you idiot.

Yes, yes... I have known this since I was like 12 years old. I just wanted to make absolutely sure. for some reason his response made me crack up.

Then I ended up accidentally calculating the mass of helium wrong anyway... stupid neutrons.

:)

Look out, Boston, here we come!

Let the games begin.

0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The future

From now on any caption on a picture/video of me will say "Owns home computer"

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2

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Quote from a conversation I had today:

"Is there anything I need to bring from Denmark?
For you?
Like some candy thingy?
That you are craving for
Or some weird Danish thing...that isn't me"


hahaha. Yes, I have a "weird Danish thing" coming to visit. :)

4

Where the world wants to go

Top Google search suggestions for "travel to":

india
cuba
mexico
canada
thailand
italy
china
japan
europe
australia

I've only been to like 4 of these...

5

Why I love Billy

I've not lived here very long--only about half a year--and I've known Billy almost that long. He is a pretty decent human being. Billy and I met at a camping trip soon after I moved here (back when, you know, it was still warm enough here to go camping without dying). I probably wouldn't have talked to him at all except my roommate had met him before but couldn't remember his name, so she asked me to ask him, since I didn't know him. So I obliged. Wasn't that nice of me. It was all downhill from there. haha, just kidding. Billy and I eventually ended up in an argument over who was the biggest nerd (we were both accusing each other of being more nerdy). I don't remember who "won," but if you ask him he will probably tell you that I am much more nerdy than he is. (He has considered me a tomboy ever since, and has ignored all my efforts to prove I can be girly...)

Billy is really smart. So smart, in fact, that he goes to MIT. I was immediately impressed by this fact when I found out, although I pretended not to be. I didn't even apply to MIT because I knew I wouldn't get accepted there. So that shows how much smarter he is than I am. Billy studies polymers and one time he let me come to his lab and he showed me how to make a polymer. (I like to say that "we" made it, even though I pretty much did nothing but watch.) I thought this was awesome, as I have always wanted to make a polymer ever since an internship I did as a junior. But, enough about me. Back to Billy.

Billy's interests are many and varied. For instance, he has a whole jungle of carnivorous plants in his bedroom. I once had a Venus Fly Trap for a while but it died. So I am quite impressed with his menagerie. Billy also has fish. I call some of them mine because I went with him to buy them. Billy likes to watch scifi and so do I, which is cool.

One Saturday I was at home minding my own business when Billy sent me an address and said "please meet me there at 3:30." I was kind of annoyed because he had given me no explanation, and it was freezing outside and I didn't feel like walking all over the place and I was thinking "man, it's not that easy to just meet you at some arbitrary location... some of us don't have bikes you know!" But since he said "please," I did it anyway. It turned out that the arbitrary location was the address of a person from whom he was buying a bike, which he gave me for Christmas. Then I felt guilty for being annoyed. :P

Billy is a very kind person. One thing I've noticed about him in the short time we've known each other is that he understands the concept of sacrifice. Once I was really sick and feeling miserable and I was whining to him online, and he biked all the way over to my house in the cold, just to cheer me up. I really appreciated it. He also watched Dr. Horrible with me on his big screen TV even though he hates it, which was a big sacrifice on his part. I know these are kind of lame examples, but just trust me on this.

I think it's also safe to say that Billy is popular with the ladies, since almost every time I see him there are girls flocking around him. ;) But I guess it's not hard to figure out why.

Billy quotes Dr. Horrible to me all the time, which in itself is a reason to love him. My life here is definitely better because I know him.

6

Open letter to MBTA

Dear The T,

What is wrong with you?! Why do you persist in making my life miserable by repeatedly making me late to class, dumping me off in the cold to run "express" somewhere, passing me on your merry express way while I stand there freezing, almost driving me to pass out while waiting for you for HALF AN HOUR in the freezing cold after I had just donated blood, etc etc etc. Why why WHY can't you just be ON TIME when I actually need you?

I have some advice for you: if there is a certain time of day when the trains are standing-room-only, and they have to pass waiting passengers because there is no room to pick them up, RUN MORE TRAINS during that time of day. It's really not that difficult. I'm so tired of trying to cram myself into one of the doors and shove my way in far enough that the door will close. Also, what's with the whole stopping at 12:30 am including weekends? Some of us have a night-life, you know. Or maybe we would if staying out past 12:30 wouldn't cause us to be stranded with no way to get home. Seriously.

Maybe more people would ride on you if you weren't so unreliable and frustrating. Perhaps you don't think it's worth it to invest more money into improving yourself, because you don't have that many passengers. But more people might CHOOSE the T over a car if it weren't in general such an all-around miserable experience. The lack of parking in the city is definitely on your side, my friend. Else I'm sure many more people would be driving to work every day. You're not really making yourself into a plesant alternative. I can't even take a bike on the green line for goodness sakes. why...

I'm tired of being forced to rely on you, The T. I'm tired of putting my hopes in you only to have them dashed over and over. I'm tired of being let down by you. Our relationship is rocky at best, and going downhill. You are inconsitent, unreliable, noisy, inconsiderate, and uncaring. I need more out of this relationship than you've been giving me. I now have a bike. As soon as I get my red blinkie light fixed (or buy a new one) your reign of terror in my life will have come to an end. You probably won't even miss me.

Hate,
JM

an open letter to the powers that be at BU:

Dear BU,

WHY ARE YOU RUNNING THE AIR CONDITIONER IN THE CLASSROOM IN THE MIDDLE OF WINTER?!?! Hello, have you looked outside lately? Did you not realize that all that white stuff on the ground is SNOW? It pains my little tree-hugging soul to see the radiators on full blast, and then hear the AC click on. Besides the obvious environmental irresponsibility this shows, it can't be good for your budget. I had to go to my office and get a sweatshirt in the middle of class because I was freezing. If I'm going to be freezing and wearing layers to class, you might as well not heat it at all. But the whole heat+AC thing... it's not really working.

Sincerely,
JM

7

Why I love Burfelt

Tonight I shall take a few moments before going to sleep to write a dedication to Burfelt. Man, where should I even start...

Burfelt is probably the coolest person I have ever known. I say that because he is the person I feel is most like me out of everyone I have ever known. So really I just think I am really cool. hahaha. Burfelt "gets" me, which is nice. It makes communication easier. We accomplish a great deal of communication without using real words. Sometimes that makes it difficult for other people to understand us. If Burfelt and I got stranded on a desert island for 6 months, when we got rescued we would be speaking an entirely new language (with large parts of it derived from moose sounds and various references to bees). That's how bad it is. People that hang out with us probably get annoyed. We also spend large amounts of time laughing hysterically at things that only the two of us seem to find funny. I must say this is a huge improvement over my life before I knew Burfelt, when I spent large amounts of time laughing hysterically by myself... and looking like a lunatic.

It's amazing that Burfelt and I met at all, when you consider how many times we should have met and didn't for one reason or another. Seriously, they were many. Eventually the forces of nature combined, the stars aligned, and I happened to show up at his apartment with a friend of a mutual friend to watch football (soccer for all you yankees). At this point he pretty much had nothing in his apartment except a TV, an air mattress (performing the job of a couch), and a chair. Those were good times. I've heard a rumor that he's still sleeping on the air mattress, but that's completely ridiculous. Of course he would have gotten a bed by now. :P But, I digress. I wish I could say I looked into his eyes that first moment and knew that we were destined to be friends forever, but the sad truth is that I stared stupidly at him because he started talking to me in Danish and he talks fast and I didn't understand a word he was saying to me. Then he realized I was a native speaker of American, and switched to English. Then I said hi. Then I promply ignored him pretty much the rest of the evening because, hello, Yepzen was there.

Eventually Burfelt and I bonded over our mutual love for Indiana Jones and bacon, and the rest is history. We went on many excursions to the beach at 1am. Ate many pizzas. Planned many things that we never actually got around to doing (going to the deer park, visiting castles, ice skating, etc). Talked. Laughed. Watched a Trekkie documentary. Rode the Metro. I could go on, but I think I'm failing to capture the magnificance of it all.

Burfelt is a great person. If I were to make a model of a great person, I think it would resemble Burfelt in many ways. He is one of the most even-tempered people I know. I think I've only seen him mad once. And it was pretty justifiable. Burfelt is also a good friend. I don't mean he is a good friend of mine (I mean, he is, but that's not what I'm trying to say), I mean he is good at being a friend. He is kind, considerate, and he is always willing to help out a friend in need. I wish I were more like Burfelt in a lot of ways. Burfelt always assumes the best of a person and I think by so doing he encourages people to be the best they can be.

When I am with Burfelt I feel like I am a better person. And that is one of the highest compliments I can give. So, I think I'll end on that note.

8

Why I love Yepzen

This is another post in my new "Why I love..." series.

Yepzen is awesome, simply put. It seems like we've been friends forever. I still find it hard to believe that we only met a little over a year ago. Wow. Actually we first met online about a year and 7 months ago when I was looking for a place to live in good ol' Copenhagen and I thought maybe he could help me out (by moving out of his place so I could move in there). He turned out to be no help at all in the housing department, due to the fact that he decided not to move (I forgave him about this later, since I realized if he had moved, I never would have met him). :P We chatted a few subsequent times but he didn't really want to give me the time of day. Then, a few months later after I was all settled in, who should come over to my apartment accompanied by a mutual friend, but the J-dawg himself. I didn't immediately draw the connection, but I realized later that night who he was and called him a punk (for blowing me off the first time we "met"... he of course was very regretful of this, having now met me in real life and seeing how gorgeous/charismatic/funny I was). And thus was the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Yepzen and I spent many a happy hour watching movies together at his apartment or mine. (And eating pizza. With egg. Yum.) Usually we just ended up talking about anything and everything, and didn't really pay much attention to the movie. Once I just said "we're just going to talk the whole time anyway, why bother putting on a movie at all?" So we didn't. And we had a great time.

We also had some good times playing pool at the CES building, and once we cooked dinner together for all the UV (YSA). That was great fun. Everyone liked our food, too. yay. :)

Yepzen is always willing to help people out, especially me, which makes him awesome in my book. :) He is the best Danish-English translator I know! He voluntarily suffered through many hours of translating for me at FHA (FHE). Sometimes the person talking would switch to English and he would just keep on "translating"--paraphrasing to me what they were saying--for a minute before realizing what he was doing. It was quite hilarious.

Yepzen is always nice to people and he is a great example to me. I admire him a lot. He also teaches seminary which I think is awesome. Yepzen has blond curly hair and the bluest blue eyes I have ever seen. (girls, he's available ;) He doesn't think he's cute, but he totally is. He is also funny. He has a great personality, and he makes me laugh.

I know that if I am ever having a bad day and I need someone to whine to, Yepzen will be there to listen to me (unless, you know, it's like 4 am his time or something... stupid time zone difference). He even bought me a webcam for Christmas so now we can do video chat, which rocks. I am going to see Yepzen in 9 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't wait.

There are but a handful of people in this world whom I call "best friends." Yepzen is one of them.

9

A word of advice...

Using the fact that Unix Timestamp 1234567890 falls on a certain day is probably not the best excuse to ask someone out... especially if that day happens to be Feb 14th.

I'll still be celebrating. :D

UPDATE: I just found out that in my timezone it will actually be occurring on Feb 13th. Man, there go my Valentines day plans...

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The makings of a great day

Yesterday I had dinner with some of my friends. Good times were had by all. Various references to a certain professor were made, even though some of the people there (and the person most making them) didn't even know him. Alas, his reputation precedes him. It's not a good one.

On the way to said dinner, I accidentally dropped my glove as I was getting on the T. I didn't realize this until I was on the T. Fast forward 6 hours when I was coming home. I went back over to where I had been standing waiting for a train, and I found my glove! I was so happy. It had been snowing so I was worried it would be covered in snow. But it wasn't. Yay.

Then, this morning I woke up to an email full of compliments, including, "Oh... and I'm glad you aren't a cheese sandwich cause I would be eating you right now" Man, could this day get any better? I think not.

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Why I love Ryan

(even though he went to Bertucci's without me...)

Ryan is funny. No, funny does not begin to describe it: he is downright hilarious. Unfortunately his jokes are sometimes so subtle they are completely lost on people. Sometimes he will say something and I will start laughing and everyone else missed it so they just look at me like I'm a moron. (I'm used to getting that look, though. :P) Once Ryan put his Facebook status as "Ryan's suitcase happened in Vegas." This was probably the funniest thing I had heard all day and I couldn't stop laughing about it. Usually when Ryan says something I find amusing I say "I love you, Ryan!" He once stated that when I say "I love you" to him, I really mean "I think what you just said is really funny." Which may be true. :P

One time I was hanging out with Ryan and his girlfriend watching a movie. Midway through it Ryan said "Hey JM, if you want to go in the other room it's fine... just FYI." ha ha ha. I stayed and watched the whole movie anyway.

Ryan is also very intelligent (which is another reason I like his humor). And he's a very nice guy. He's considerate and thoughtful and he notices and remembers little things that most people don't notice, or forget. One time we were talking about games and I told him how much I loved the game Encore. Much later, he bought it for me for Christmas. I was so surprised (and delighted) that he even remembered I liked/wanted that game.

All in all, Ryan is a great guy. I'm lucky to know him.

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Why I love Katie

Me: Hey Katie, do you have any thumbtacks?
Katie: what?
Me: you know, thumbtacks, like for hanging stuff on walls...?
Katie: no... but I have a buffalo nickel!

If there had been any floor space I would have been rolling on it (laughing) at this point, however, Katie's junk was all over the floor, so I didn't. :)

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14

"Crash And Burn"

When you feel all alone
And the world has turned its back on you
Give me a moment please to tame your wild wild heart
I know you feel like the walls are closing in on you
It's hard to find relief and people can be so cold
When darkness is upon your door and you feel like you can't take anymore

Let me be the one you call
If you jump I'll break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash then crash and burn
You're not alone

When you feel all alone
And a loyal friend is hard to find
You're caught in a one way street
With the monsters in your head
When hopes and dreams are far away and
You feel like you can't face the day

Let me be the one you call
If you jump I'll break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash then crash and burn
You're not alone

'Cause there has always been heartache and pain
And when it's over you'll breathe again
You'll breathe again

-- Savage Garden

Christmas Traditions

I know this is a little late, but I've been meaning to write down some of the Christmas traditions that my family has. These are some of the more crazy ones. (We're weird.)

Christmas Eve Dinner
Every Christmas Eve we have hamburgers for dinner. (Just FYI for those non-US readers of mine, in America we celebrate Christmas on the 25th, not the 24th... so the big Chrismas dinner is on Christmas Day, the 25th.) This has been a family tradition ever since I can remember, and my brothers and I have always hated it and complained about it almost every year. At this point both the hamburgers and the complaining have become tradition and I don't think any of us would allow it to be changed.

Christmas cookies
We always make sugar cookies and frost them--green trees, yellow stars, and red bells. And sometimes some other shapes. They are so good. We usually give them to friends and neighbors, and save a lot for ourselves, too. I think the "my mom makes the BEST [insert some type of food here]!!!" thing is the most annoying cliche ever, but it's true that our cookies are probably better than anyone else's that I've ever had. (Most people make thin dry cookies, ours are thick and moist and not overcooked.) Also, they are like fine wine--better with age. If you leave them for a couple days and let the frosting flavor meld with the cookie, it's so much better. When I am out of the country and/or unable to come home for Chrismas, I always demand that my mom send me some cookies. Last year she mailed 2 to Denmark. They were still edible when they arrived. :)

Opening presents on Christmas Eve
A lot of people do this--open one gift on Christmas Eve. We usually do it too. (Actually I can't remember if I did that this year or not...) It's fun. But the real tradition is the one I started: you can't peek at your own gifts, but it's perfectly okay to peek at other people's, since they will still be surprised. So now we always sneak peaks to see what everyone got for everyone else... ("I wonder what grandma got for Aaron..." "Hmmm... what's this present from mom to Nathan?" etc) My mom doesn't approve of this tradition. I wonder why.

Upside-down Dr. Mario
It all started one Christmas when my brothers and I were all home from college for Christmas break, and getting bored. We ended up playing Nintendo (on the original NES system). We were having a Dr. Mario competition, but since we are all pretty good at that game it wasn't very challenging. Then, around 1 am someone suggested we play upside down--meaning you lie on your back with your head toward the TV and look backward at it. This proved to be much more entertaining, and a new tradition was born. I'm not sure my mom even knows about this one. :P

Reading Luke 2 on Christmas Eve
We also read the nativity story in Luke 2 on Christmas Eve. Usually my mom herds us all up and makes my dad read it. This was often accompanied by some (good-natured) whining when we were younger. Fun times. Also there may or may not be a joke cracked about a "crowded manger." ("And they came with haste, and found Mary, and Joseph, and the babe lying in a manger.")

Reading 3rd Nephi on Christmas
We recently started reading in 3rd Nephi on Christmas morning--where it talks about the signs of the birth of Christ in the Americas. This is kind of cool.

I broke down and did a "meme". Don't tell anyone.

Apparently everyone who is cool in the entire blogosphere is doing this. I've never done one before (and generally scorn the entire idea of them) but it's better than making the effort to think of my own clever post.

35 things about 2008 thingymibob:

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?
A whole heck of a lot.
-started graduate school
-backpacked Europe
-cut my hair really short
-stood on a scale in an elevator and watched the reading change due to the up/downward acceleration
-and many more exciting things I can't think of at the moment

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don't really remember what they were, so no, I probably didn't. But yeah, I'll make more. As usual. I see no reason not to.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
My sister in law. Now I'm an aunt!!!! :)

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Ummm... no.

5. What countries did you visit?
Denmark (!!), Norway, Sweden, Germany, Netherlands, Belgium, England, Scotland, Ireland, France, Italy, Switzerland... maybe one or two others.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
Sanity.... Honestly, there isn't really anything important that I lacked in 2008. I have quite the charmed life. (Maybe I should have a little more gratitude....)

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory and why?
May 21--the day the new Indiana Jones movie came out. And some other stuff happened. ;)

May 31--if ever there were a perfect day, this was it. I felt like I was living something out of a movie. A really good movie. (not sci-fi, though...)

Oct 31--it was a really rough day (think midterm) that turned out okay in the end. Plus it was Halloween so easy to remember the date.

is there a pattern here...?

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Passing all my classes in my first semester of grad school!! Heck, getting accepted to grad school! And getting a 12 on my Interstellar Medium paper. A 12!!!!!

9. What was your biggest failure?
Oh, I dunno.... I dropped the ball on a lot of things this year. Especially this semester was really rough. I guess I feel like I failed at looking outward and seeing other people and what they need, and helping them, because I was feeling pretty self-absorbed a lot of the time.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Yes. I had mono and was in bed for almost 2 months. 2 long months... it was horrible. I'd like to say I'm stronger for it, but I'm really not. I still get tired out more easily than I did before getting mono. Perhaps I'm more compassionate, though.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
What did I buy? I can't remember anything really big. New pants (finally)! Awesome Christmas presents for my roommates.

12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?
My little brother was pretty cool. He's turning out to be a pretty good kid, even though he can act like a bratty teenager sometimes. Also, Aaron and I spent an entire month together almost 24/7, and didn't kill each other. That merits something. At least a cookie.

13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
Pretty much society in general. And people who do things they shouldn't when they know better.

14. Where did most of your money go?
I wish I knew. ha ha, just kidding. Rent. Groceries. Trip to Denmark over Thanksgiving. Savings account. That's about it.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
My new niece! My backpacking trip across Europe. Seeing Stonehenge. Going back to Denmark to see all my friends! Astrophysics. FINALLY understanding magnetic reconnection.

16. What song will always remind of you 2008?
Ramt i Natten... because it was on the radio all the freaking time.

17. Compared to this time last year, are:
a)happier or sadder? I don't know... last year was a long time ago. And it's hard to average over an entire year. 2008 had its ups and downs, that's for sure. But I think overall I'm a bit happier, because I got rid of some things in my life that were bringing me down.

b)thinner or fatter? Thinner. Somehow I dropped a pants size or two.

c) richer or poorer? About the same. My net worth is probably slightly lower than it was last year.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Doing homework on time. Working out consistently. Archery.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Procrastinating. Eating junk.

20. Did you fall in love in 2008?
Absolutely. For the first time.

21. What was your favourite TV program?
Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog. But that probably doesn't really count... so... I dunno. I watched some House. And Star Trek. I had a brief affair with Psych. That's all I can remember.

22. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Not really. Maybe I should check my hate list....
Update: Nate just reminded me that he should be listed here.

23. What was the best book you read?
Mere Christianity. Again.

24. What was your greatest musical discovery?
hahaha. For some reason I just like the way that's phrased. Nothing in the musical world really stands out to me from 2008 as being my "greatest discovery." Oh wait, yes... so there was this one song that I was looking everywhere for but I couldn't remember any of the words or anything, all I knew was that it was an oldie. And I could not for the life of me find the song, and then just about a week ago I was at home with my parents and my dad was listening to Pandora, and the song came on! I shrieked "what's this song called?!" and my dad told me, and gave me a weird look. I was SO happy that I had finally discovered it. I'm not even going to tell you what it was because you'll probably make fun of me, but trust me, it was definitely the greatest musical "discovery" I've made in a long time.

25. What did you want and get?
Cineplexity! And Encore! And new socks. And a bike! Man, what an awesome year this was.

26. What did you want and not get?
New laptop. And a car, but I kinda changed my mind on that one.

27. What was your favourite film of this year?
Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog. hahaha, you saw that one coming.
Also, Encounters at the End of the World was good.
And Wall-E. I adored that one.
Hoodwinked wasn't technically this year, but I think I discovered it this year, so I'm counting it.

28. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Talked to Chris. Went to church. Hung out with roommates. Ate pink cupcakes. 26.

29. How you would describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
hahaha. Ask Nate. green pants all the way.

30. What kept you sane?
I'm sane? :P

A certain tree-hugger tried his best. And of course, my other friends, and family.

31. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I don't know. I'm not really into celebrities all that much.

32. Who did you miss?
My American friends (and family) when I was in Denmark. Especially my favorite cousin Matthew. My Danish friends after I came back to the US. And Catherine every time we were apart for more than a couple hours. :D

33. Who was the best new person you met?
I can't pick just one. I met Troels the end of 2007 but I'll mention him anyway. Also, Chris, Catherine, Ryan, Nate... and probably everyone else that reads this blog that I met in 2008.

34. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
"Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted, but in getting what you have, which once you have got it, you may be smart enough to see, was what you would have wanted had you known..."

35. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
You're so sugar sweet
You may as well have had 'kick me'
Fastened on your sleeve
. . .
Your achilles heel
Is the tendency to dream
But you've know that from the beginning
You didn't have to go so far
You didn't have to go.
. . .
You know what you are
You're gonna be a star.
You know what you are
You're gonna be a star

You know who you are

OR

Took a right to the end of the line
Where no one ever goes.
Ended up on a broken train with nobody I know.

Ok, neither of these sum up the year, really, but I like them. I'll work on finding a better song.

What the world wants to know

This is a sequel to my post from last week, "what the world wants to do." I think I may turn this into a regular thing.

Today's Google search: why

why so serious
why is the sky blue
why did i get married
why lyrics
why men cheat
why did the chicken cross the road
why do we fight
why vote for obama
why do cats purr
why why love


My commentary/answers:
-I didn't really like Dark Knight, and didn't think the Joker was quite as amazing as everyone said he was.
-Rayleigh scattering.
-I don't know, but I'm sorry you have to ask Google.
-"Why" must be a band... or a song.
-Wouldn't we all like to know... but hey, women sometimes cheat too you know.
-Because it was too long to go around.
-Probably because you have poor communication skills.
-Well, it's a little late for that now, isn't it?
-I don't know, but it's a nice sound...
-See previous post. :)

On true love

Yesterday I spent a few hours having a very interesting discussion about love with an equally interesting person. The definition of love as "a chemical imbalance in the brain" came up. Which of course led to the mention of oxytocin, and then we ended up reading some interesting articles that we found online. Here are some highlights from one of them:

In 2000, Andreas Bartels and Semir Zeki of University College, London, located the areas of the brain activated by romantic love. They took students who said they were madly in love, put them into a brain scanner, and looked at their patterns of brain activity.

The results were surprising. For a start, a relatively small area of the human brain is active in love, compared with that involved in, say, ordinary friendship. “It is fascinating to reflect”, the pair conclude, “that the face that launched a thousand ships should have done so through such a limited expanse of cortex.” The second surprise was that the brain areas active in love are different from the areas activated in other emotional states, such as fear and anger. Parts of the brain that are love-bitten include the one responsible for gut feelings, and the ones which generate the euphoria induced by drugs such as cocaine. So the brains of people deeply in love do not look like those of people experiencing strong emotions, but instead like those of people snorting coke.

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Love = a person snorting coke...

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Then there is attraction, or the state of being in love (what is sometimes known as romantic or obsessive love). This is a refinement of mere lust that allows people to home in on a particular mate. This state is characterised by feelings of exhilaration, and intrusive, obsessive thoughts about the object of one's affection. Some researchers suggest this mental state might share neurochemical characteristics with the manic phase of manic depression. Dr Fisher's work, however, suggests that the actual behavioural patterns of those in love — such as attempting to evoke reciprocal responses in one's loved one — resemble obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD).

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Love = a person with OCD, snorting coke...

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That raises the question of whether it is possible to “treat” this romantic state clinically, as can be done with OCD. The parents of any love-besotted teenager might want to know the answer to that. Dr Fisher suggests it might, indeed, be possible to inhibit feelings of romantic love, but only at its early stages. OCD is characterised by low levels of a chemical called serotonin. Drugs such as Prozac work by keeping serotonin hanging around in the brain for longer than normal, so they might stave off romantic feelings. (This also means that people taking anti-depressants may be jeopardising their ability to fall in love.) But once romantic love begins in earnest, it is one of the strongest drives on Earth. Dr Fisher says it seems to be more powerful than hunger. A little serotonin would be unlikely to stifle it.

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Love = a terminal disease, which can be treated in its early stages but as soon as it gets out of hand it becomes incurable... and a person with OCD, snorting coke

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Of course the usual questions arose: is love nothing more than a chemical reaction? or is there more to it than that? why do we love certain people and not others? I love how this article compares love to a person with OCD, and snorting coke. Sometimes that is how it makes you feel. After all, people (myself included) have done some pretty stupid things in the name of "love."

But, I think this article is only discussing one part of love. The more physical, infatuation-type love. They also mentioned more long-term love which they called, so coldly and clinically, "pair bonding," but something was definitely missing. I believe in love. I believe that when you really love someone, they change you. You feel like a better person just being with them. You care less about yourself and your own happiness than you do about them and theirs. You are willing to sacrifice what you want for what they want, or for what is best for the two of you as a couple.

I also believe in soul-mates. Not, perhaps, in the way the article mentions them, in that you have a certain "type" of person that you are born to love. Nor really in the way that some people think of them--that there is one person on this Earth meant to be with you, and you have to find that person. Rather, to me a soul mate is a person whose soul seems to resonate with yours. Someone that you can look at and know what they are thinking, or with whom you can communicate without either of you ever saying a word. Someone that "gets" you on a fundamental level. A soul mate is a person that, when you are walking down the street, or in a science museum, or surfing the web, and you see something that you find interesting or fascinating, they are the first person you think of because you know that they will find it just as interesting or fascinating or entertaining as you do. It is a person that completes you as a person, without whom you feel like a part of yourself is missing.

I have long since believed that falling in love is not about finding a perfect person, but about finding a person that you love perfectly--so completely that you love the good and the bad and the strengths and the weakness equally. No one is perfect--everyone has faults. True love should not lead you to believe the object of your affections is perfect and free of weakness. Rather, when you find true love with someone, you love them in spite of, or even because of these weaknesses, imperfections, and faults. You love the whole person, the package deal. (That's not to say, of course, that you don't want to encourage the person to work to overcome their weaknesses, and grow, and become a better person... but you don't love them any less for their shortcomings.) I believe this because, at least to a degree, I have experienced it.

Following perusal of the above mentioned article, we were discussing soul mates. I opened the Firefox search bar to locate the part of the article that mentioned soul mates. So I could recall how they were defining it. It wasn't until much later that I noticed the search bar was still open, displaying my earlier search:

Find: soulmate

If only it were that easy for everyone.